“Upside Down Holidays”

How have you all been?!

I’ve been binge-watching this show on Netflix called Elite. Because I am terrible at informatively but briefly describing what a show is about, this is how Wikipedia describes it: “Elite is a Spanish drama television series created for Netflix by Carlos Montero and Darío Madrona. The series is set in Las Encinas, a fictional elite high school and revolves around the relationships between three working-class students enrolled at the school through a scholarship program and their wealthy classmates.” It’s a crime, drama, and thriller show worth watching! And this isn’t a spoiler alert, but at the beginning of every season, someone is dead, we initially don’t know who it is, and the episodes walk us through who it is, who may/may not have done it, and more!

In one of the episodes, one of the characters hosts a Valentine’s Day party and the theme is “upside down.” It’s not what you might think an upside-down party would be — no one is required to walk around on their hands the entire time lol — but it required the men to come in their sexiest, skimpiest getups and the ladies to wear suits! The guests were also required to provide the food/drinks rather than the host. I think it was a really cute and clever theme.

I’m not hosting any holiday parties or anything, and I’m not even sending out holiday cards this year, but I feel like my holiday season has been upside down!

A few months ago, I took a break from some things and reduced the number of obligations I had. I also chose to not continue a couple of leadership positions in the coming new year. I do this kind of cleanse every so often when I begin to feel overwhelmed or when I realize the passion I once had for the initiative/role is no longer present. I am not the type of person to half-do anything, so I don’t like holding a title just because. If I’m in that role, I want to put my best foot forward and do the work with excellence.

I did a really great job reducing the number of things I had to tend to, and I was able to devote more time to myself and my new relationship. (Yep, your girl is no longer single and asking “where my man at?!” Hahahaha!) I know I didn’t devote any time to my blog or my YouTube channel though, but that’s what feels so upside down right now. I took time to clear off my schedule but I didn’t spend the “extra” time writing, reading, or recording content. Things that make me happy. At first, I felt kind of guilty and hypocritical about it, but then I accepted the fact that it’s okay to not do anything during your “extra” free time. It’s also okay to take time to adjust to new things in your life!

But! About a month ago, when I’m supposed to be decreasing obligations rather than piling them on, I done went and applied for a part-time job! *rolling eye emoji* Like, girl! What were you thinking?! That decision was sooo upside-down! Lol! I figured being a bartender for a few months would bring in some extra cash (and who doesn’t want or like extra cash?!); I could work the bar on some evenings and the weekends and still be able to manage my legal career, be a good partner in my relationship, and have my sanity. I went to the interview and got offered the job right on the spot, but then I started second-guessing my decision to work another job. My boyfriend told me not to get the second job in the first place because he knew how exhausted I would be trying to juggle both gigs, but at first, of course, I was hardheaded and ready for the challenge. But by the time orientation came around a week or two later, I no longer wanted to work two jobs lol. I came to my senses and realized that I ain’t gonna want to serve nobody no dang drink after a long day in court. Shoot, I’m going to want my own drink!

I’m embarrassed to say that I worked a total of 3 hours at the new job smh. After orientation, I politely informed them that I no longer was interested in moving forward with the position. I believe the supervisors took it well and I hope I didn’t leave a bad taste in their mouths. That kind of behavior is not normal for me, but I knew it had to be done and I’m glad I chose myself and my well-being first. I’m also glad I made that decision sooner rather than later. (I am not encouraging you all to join things just to quit or move on from them, but I am encouraging you all to listen to your inner self and your loved ones when it comes to adding too much onto your plate and to recognize when something isn’t for you).

I am happy with my choice! I can now focus on closing out 2022 in a good place and welcoming 2023 with open arms. This year for the holidays, rather than flying back and forth to Pennsylvania to see my family, I chose to spend the holidays with my boyfriend and his family. It was a nice change of pace and I am looking forward to spending time with them tomorrow for Christmas!

Off the Record, A Lifestyle Blog is officially back in action! The posts will probably come less frequently than every Thursday, but they will still come. Writing this post has reminded me how much I enjoy sharing some pieces of myself with you all and using this platform as an outlet. You should feel happy and find some solace when doing your craft not overwhelmed, pressured, or anxious. If you need to change course or edit how things are done. Do that. If you need to take a break for a little while. Do that. If you need to ask for advice. Do that. Do what makes you happy and do it in a way that is true to yourself.

Happy Holidays, yall! Be safe and stay warm!

Moni Jay, Off the Record